Javier Zamora

TO CATCH LA ZUMBADORA 

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la zumbadora (genus unknown) Two to three meters long, medium girth, sometimes seen with a rattle, sometimes blue-white checkered patterned, sometimes red with black stripes. Only leñeros have recorded sightings. To catch the fastest snake in the world and hold the oldest secret, the following must be executed: 

You must be unpredictable. Slash tires forgotten atop rooftops, unpredictable run barefoot across cotton-fields, unpredictable translate hymns wearing a plastic cape and touch the president’s mustache while listening to the body-count at seven, unpredictable soak newspapers in coconut juice to predict the cease-fire and laugh at infested bloated faces. O zumbadora seeker, you must be unpredictable to catch immortality.